4 Crying Out Loud

Ten Pillars of Life

2010-01-29T14:03:00.000-07:00

10 PILLARS OF A POSITIVE ATTITUDE IN LEADERSHIP

Examine life

Worry only about those things under your control

Treasure friendship

Experience true pleasure

Master yourself

Avoid excess

Be a responsible human being

Don't be a prosperous fool

Don't do evil to others

Kindness to others tends to be rewarded

BECOME YOUR BEST FRIEND AND CANCEL LEARNED BEHAVIOR AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS IN YOUR LIFE.

So I Went For A Walk

2009-10-20T11:03:00.006-06:00

The other day I was wrestling with another one of life’s little problems, which of course always seems to companion with an agitated state of mind. Yup, I’m one of the “THOSE PEOPLE,” the one’s that take life way too seriously and thus are sentenced to suffer from the effects of the three headed monster agitation, stress and worry. It just so happened that day I was talking on the phone to a person I had just met, a very wise person, and I guess the negative undertow became a tad too visible and she said to me, “Bill, go for a walk. Take your camera and just go for a walk. I want you to observe the things around you and simply relax.” Well, I’m a photographer, so I found the advice appealing and besides I wasn’t getting anywhere to begin with that day in my negative frame of mind, so I did just that, I went for a walk with my camera.

As I went out the door I started thinking about the possible objects I could take a picture of. Now I was taking “THAT” too seriously! I’m a serious photographer and at the time I wasn’t anywhere special, thus no grand scenic’s were about to magically appear and the weather wasn’t especially conducive to a great photo, so the next National Geographic cover would have to wait and worse yet, I still felt angry inside. I knew I needed to square myself away and get focused on the job at hand, relaxing and taking a couple of pictures of something, anything I might find interesting, if I was to have any success on my little walk. It was then I recalled some very sage advice I’d read in one of my favorite photography books which said; “Sometimes the best picture’s right there at your feet. Look around and get a feel for your surroundings.” What that statement meant was, sometimes the photographer’s so obsessed with getting that next great image, he doesn’t take the time to look around where he’s at and notice the little things that are sometime’s right there at his feet that are actually quite beautiful in their own right.

Well, that got me to thinking, which at times for me is dangerous, but I took that advice one step further and thought to myself, “Would you just calm down and as they say, smell the roses! There’s help and positive signs all around you if you’ll just take the time to relax and observe.” In other words, the answers to my problems were right there at my feet I’d only take time to look and listen to what my own heart was telling me. It struck me that the primary reason I was agitated was because I was trying to be something I really wasn’t. It’s a problem that most of us have. There we are, trying to please everybody but ourselves and despite the Job title, the big house, the nice car and the six figure salary, we’re absolutely miserable and we just don’t know why. Isn’t having the big car or the six figure salary supposed to make us happy? They said it would!

I don’t care what your damn job title is or how smart you think you are or what model BMW you’re currently driving, if you’re unhappy, it’s because you’re disconnected from that which you truly are. If you’re achieving the things “They” said would make you happy and you’re in fact miserable, it’s simply because you’re not aligned with what it is you were sent here to do. I know, I know, easy to say, but nonetheless, it’s true. If you’re a corporate guy or gal and you have the big salary and the job tile with lots of consonants and the pretty house on the hill and you’re miserable you’ll remain that way until you’re doing what it was you were really wired to do.

So “Mr. Know it All” how am I supposed to figure that little problem out and I say, “What are you passionate about?” What are the things that you love to do where time seems to stand still, fatigue is never an issue and when you’re finished, you can’t wait to do it again? I’m guessing the answer to your question starts there. Do you love being outdoors on a mountain trail? Are you a lover of the arts and music? Do you go to a far off place every time you walk into your garden and chat with your plants? Do you love to read and write? Maybe you love working with kids? All I’m saying is if the job makes you miserable and there’s hobby’s that energize you and excite you, you’re looking at “Your Wiring.” That’s where you start and it’s important to start because life’s too short not to live it doing the things you love to do. There are people today that get paid lots of money because they do what they’re passionate about. They will tell you they never, ever work a day in their lives because they love what they’re doing. So just where is it written you can’t have the same kind of life?

I got back from my walk that day and I had four really nice images that I was proud of and I also had some ideas I was going to explore that I knew would put me on the right path to being a little happier and lot less concerned about my perceived problems. Life’s simply too short to spend it being stressed out and angry. It was meant to be filled with joy and happiness. It can only happen if you just take a walk and look at all the beautiful little things that are right there at your feet. Shush, be quiet. Hear it, that voice? It’ll tell you everything you need to know about what will make “You” happy. It should, it’s your inner voice after all.

Tips For Baby Boomers Looking At Home Business Opportunities

2009-10-02T10:20:00.005-06:00

· The purpose of this article is to shed a little light on the world of Internet Marketing for my fellow baby boomers. We're that great big glob of people that grew up after the war and before the internet. We remember telephones with dials, Black and White TV and the only GPS system we had in our 62 Chevy or Ford was a Rand McNally map with lots of notes written all over it. Now we find ourselves approaching retirement during some very uncertain economic times and we're curious about making money working from home on the Internet.After all, how hard can it be?

Every day we get mail in our Junk Files telling us about the latest, greatest, opportunity on the Internet or that new fangled thing called "Twitter." Why in many cases all you have to do is literally "Sign Up" and you're making thousands of dollars every month virtually on "Auto-Pilot." That's what they say! I just received one the other day and it said all I have to do is "Process E-Mails" and at "$25" for each E-Mail I can make up to "$750" a day. Now honestly folks, if that were possible, do you think the economy would be in a slump and Corporations all over America would be laying people off left and right. Of course not! Corporations would be begging for people because all their employees would have left to go process E-Mails for $3,750 a week. Those "EX- EMPLOYEES" would be flooding the economy with their stock piles of cash and the economy would be in great shape.

So here we are, sixty years young thinking, God, I worked so hard for thirty five years and look at these people getting rich on the Internet virtually doing nothing. I want to do that. Of course that little voice deep down inside us is saying, "And pigs can fly!" Guess what? That little voice deep down inside that guides you is always correct and it also knows a thing or two about pigs. It knows that making money on the Internet is no different than any other business out there, except you "Can" do it from your home.

Here's the numbers. The highly successful people on the Internet comprise roughly 3% of the people working online businesses. That's right, 97% of the people currently working online businesses are earning less than ten bucks a week. Look it up if you don't believe me. Now, what makes me an expert on this subject? Well, I was a member of the 97% group for over two years and I can appreciate just how difficult the business can be. Another qualifier might be the fact that I spent thousands of dollars on my Internet business during those two years without any success whatsoever. Finally I gave up on my business and while I was sliding towards that wonderful legal term called "Bankruptcy" I looked at over fifty Internet businesses during one three month stretch searching for the golden needle in the hay stack. I was stubborn, if not very smart. After numerous dead ends and many "Googled" realities I actually found what I was looking for. Now, I don't want this article to be about that particular business just because it was right for "ME," rather, I'd like this article to be a helpful tool for people to use if they're serious about earning a living on the Internet and looking at all the opportunities, good and bad, that are out there.

Here's what I learned and what I'd like to pass along to you. Success on the Internet is ruled by the same common sense laws that govern every other business. Every successful person you see on the Internet has sacrificed and worked "Hard" to achieve their own brand of personal success. Every successful person you see on the Internet has spent literally thousands of dollars over several years to educate themselves, which over time has also increased their "Personal Value." Every one of these people created "Systems" that worked and "Unique Content" that had a market value for others. Every one of these people spent months and years honing their skills and every one of them made mistakes along the way. Finally, and this is critical, every one of these people became "Leaders" which is the real secret behind what made them successful in the first place. You see, people don't join businesses or products as much as they join other people. It's vital you understand that if you're thinking about the rewards that come with being "Your own Boss" and "Working from the comfort of your own home."

Now let's get back to the original question. Can the "Boomer Generation" find success on the Internet? The answer is an unequivocal "Yes." Yes that is provided you do your home-work and don't get drawn in by the "Get Rich Quick" crowd. There are a lot of folks out there more than willing to take your money, so you must be diligent. There are also a lot of good people out there that have systems that work, training materials that prepare, quality products and a desire to lead and help others. So here's my list of what I think you should look for and do when investigating an Online Business.

1. If it sounds too good to be true, it is. Read the "Disclaimers," they're sobering and enlightening.

2. Good online businesses will give you value, even if you don't join their Primary business.

3. Look for businesses with solid, proven systems that make sense.

4. Does the business come with a no questions asked, money back guarantee?

5. Is it the type of business that will help you grow personally and force you out of your comfort zone? If you're not uncomfortable, you're not growing.

6. You should spend your hard earned money on books and CD's that educate you or contribute to your personal growth, not buying leads.

7. Remember that people join "You" not your product, so what are you doing to prepare yourself to become a "Leader?"

8. Be prepared to make some mistakes. If you're not making mistakes, you're probably not trying.

9. Be patient and resolute. It's a business like any other business, it takes time and patience to build.

10. After doing your research, how does it feel? Is it a fit? Remember, we're all blessed with unique talents and gifts. If for some reason it doesn't feel right deep down inside, it never will feel right. That was the bitter lesson I learned with my first online business.

11. I think this is very important. What in your mind has the person done to earn your trust and your money? I've read numerous "Rags to Riches" stories and some of them are actually true. More importantly, none of them happened over-night!

12. Last, but not least, if you're thinking about joining a business simply because he or she is standing in front of an 8,000 square foot mansion and their Boat and Rolls Royce is parked behind them in the driveway, you might want to re-think your "Why."

I sincerely hope these thoughts and observations help you in some way. Despite my own personal travails in getting started in this industry, I was blessed with a stubborn streak and I persevered and now I truly enjoy the continued growth and progress as I push forward and achieve my business goals. It took me two and a half years, but I found the people, the business and the philosophy that was the right fit for me. You can certainly take a look at it as part of your own decision making process, (www.billkenny-leadsystempro.com) but please understand there are a number of excellent online businesses out there, so look at them all. Be patient, do your home-work and you'll find the one that’s the right fit for you.

An Interesting Conversation

2009-05-07T15:09:00.003-06:00

The other day I had the most interesting conversation with this incredibly talented professional woman I know. Of course, she also happens to be my ex-wife, so that added a little spice to the conversation. She told me she admired what I was trying to do with my life and that she was pulling for me to be successful. Now, in light of what’s going on in my life, that was an incredible statement. After-all, I was the one that had walked away from Corporate America and was currently recklessly experimenting with re-making myself, while part of me was hoping Comrade Obama might be right and there would be a great big safety net waiting for me just before I bounced off the ground of failure. She was impressed with me!

Now what’s so strange about her comments is that my ex-wife is a highly educated woman that through sheer determination and hard work is now the number two person in a prestigious local Investment Banking Firm. She works daily with professionals that have law degrees, master’s degrees and advanced marketing degrees from schools named Harvard, Princeton and Northwestern. She makes six figures a year, lives in a modest town home and drives a paid for Acura, yet she’s terribly frustrated with this constant feeling of falling ever farther behind in life. As she put it to me, “I work seventy hours a week, spend an hour and a half a day in my car and another hour walking the dog.” (Yes, I go over and walk him too) She continued, “I have to sleep at least seven hours a day so I figure I have maybe two hours a day for myself. I admire you for trying to live your life the right way.”

Well, the jury’s still out on that one, but it points to something very important and why I’m on this journey of personal development and life exploration. “My Life” is simply too short to spend it day in and day out toiling for some large company in hopes that someday, just maybe I’ll be able to do the things I love to do. For most people in their lives that never happens. Imagine working hard, almost to exhaustion for forty years while raising a family, retiring and then being diagnosed with cancer. A fictional example you ask? No, that happened to my father in 1992 and he only lived two more painful years before succumbing to the disease in February of 1994. He was sixty nine years old when he died. It’s a lesson I’ll never forget. For other folks the recent financial crisis sent a frightening message through the masses. Look at the “Baby Boomer” generation. They face the specter of working a lifetime, retiring and then watching some calamity come along, devastating their nest eggs and leaving them financially hamstrung. Then what do they do? Do they live on their Social Security, in a little apartment somewhere with their traveling confined to going to the grocery store and watching the National Geographic channel and playing bingo? I don’t get that and I don’t want anything to do with that kind of mindset.

Life was meant to be lived right now, today, and with passion. Every single person has the talent and desire to express themselves in a multitude of ways that creates that internal joy that we all seek. Sadly only a small percentage of people ever earn a great living or even have the time to engage in things they enjoy, those very things that bring them pure joy and pleasure. My former wife is someone that loves to travel and as a small child she lived all over the world. Now she’s stuck with the occasional three day trip to Las Vegas and she doesn’t even gamble. She loves to reading, walking our dog on a misty spring morning, and sampling a fine Italian wine in a wonderful restaurant. She also enjoys volunteering and reading to disadvantaged kids and yet she’s caught up in this never-ending spiral of clearing the pile of paper off the desk and paying her bills. It drives me crazy.

After she and I were divorced I vowed I was going to re-create myself in my own image and the naysayers could be damned. Are times a bit tough for me right now? You bet your sweet bippy they are, yet I wouldn’t have it any other way. I now have the time to study, write, and explore the things that bring me great joy, for example capturing a beautiful image with my camera at sunset or writing a story that that makes me laugh, even if others might think I might be a bit crazy. I’m convinced that if I stay the course things will fall into place and then I will then be able to show others that they too can fulfill their dreams. If you ask just about anybody out there today, 3 out of 4 people will tell you they hate their jobs and they wish they could be doing something else. I hope to show people they can do something else and they don’t have to live their lives never having the time to enjoy themselves. I want to show them that if they have a little courage, they can actually let go and pursue their life’s passions and they’ll actually be rewarded both financially and spiritually for their faith in themselves. The first person I’m out to help is my lovely Ex-Wife because she’s got so much to offer this beautiful world and it’s not from behind a desk on the thirty second floor of an office building. Well, I gotta go. It’s a gorgeous Spring Day in Colorado and my bicycle is calling.

Good Vibrations

2009-05-01T10:29:00.005-06:00

OK, this turning your life around and achieving "SUCCESS" business is now obvious to me. I'm sorry, but this is all about vibrational magnetism. How do I know? Simple! After reading thirty eight different personal development books, listening to countless CD’s on personal development and attending a couple of major seminars I can now conclude that it’s wrapped up in one simple word and one simple word only, VIBRATIONS and MAGNETISM! OK, I confess, that's two words!

Turning your life into a Hollywood style success story actually has nothing to do with how many books you've read, (in my case 38) the affirmations you’ve repeated, how you say your affirmations, the order in which you say your affirmations, goals you’ve set, how you write your goals, whether you've had the proper training on how to write your goals, seminar’s you've attended, who spoke at the seminar’s you attended, whether you broke down in tears and were filled with the spirit at the seminar’s you attended while speaking in ancient cryptic tongues, your mindset, who set your mind, where your mind was setting in the first place, whether you drank a glass of water in the morning, two glasses of water in the morning, three glasses of water in the morning, or said screw it and you drank a glass of Scotch, whether you completed the Liberty League International Beyond Freedom course once, twice, three times, four times, or whether you simply went whoo hoo six times while bathing in certified Catholic holy water, whether you journaled daily, hourly, or by the minute while listening to Napoleon Hill, Graham Hill, and Benny Hill while sitting in a lotus position in front of twelve Vision Boards with 65 pictures of a mansion in Pacific Palisades, whether you've given, given a lot, given everything, given up, given grief, given that you are a spiritual being in a physical body, given blood, whether you meditated, medicated, malfunctioned, or were malcontented, whether you've read Wayne Dyer, Dire Straits, Bob Proctor, Proctor and Gamble, Jack Canfield, Campbell’s Soup, Deepak Chopra, or Oprah it's all about VIBRATIONS and MAGNETISM, period!

If you're in a pissy mood it vibrates pissily and you’re going to attract pissy little things into your life! If you’re doing something you love and you’re purring like a kitten, you’ll attract good things into your life along with some real nice cats. So, do the only thing you can do to change your mood, do something you love and good things will happen. I am absolutely convinced we can create a beautiful life by thinking beautiful thoughts. It is after all a vibrational universe, you can't escape that!

Under Assault

2009-04-14T18:23:00.004-06:00

It’s amazing how many times I’ll read a personal development book and the author will be urging the reader to stay away from the media. The media in this case primarily means Newspapers, Television and Internet Sites. Is it a wonder why? A couple of weeks ago, just for my own amusement, I noted the headlines on my MSN.com Home page and quickly concluded we’re absolutely “Under Assault” as a society. Here are the titles that were listed that day.

· US tries to halt Cycle of Fear
· Dodgers get Manny for $45 Million
· Are Savers Dooming the Economy?
· Are you ready for a Lay-off?
· Report: Blockbuster eyeing Bankruptcy
· US could lose 8,000,000 Jobs in 2009
· Down size your ride
· Wall of Shame: 9 most embarrassing records in Sports
· Who Rocked and Who Flopped on Idol?
· Inside MSN: Fun fascinating Time Wasters
· Oprah’s Flat Stomach Secret, Obey Now!
· Sexy games for Couples plus Free Massage Oil
· McDonalds runs out of McNuggets; Woman calls 911

Talk about creating negative Mindsets and trying to instill fear in the hearts of their readers!!!! Words like “Fear, Doom, Shame, Flopped, Wasters, Obey, Sexy” and a “Nut” calling 911 because the “Nuggets” were gone?!?! That’s the kind of news that will get you into a positive frame of mind.

I admit to being a person that has decided that the major media outlets do this intentionally. I don’t know if you’d call me a “Conspiracy Nut,” but I think they’ve realized it’s in their “Best Interests” to scare and dumb people down. That’s how they remain in business and continue to earn their profits, although those profits keep shrinking. I had the great fortune this month to be able to attend a Conference in Acapulco, Mexico and one of the featured speakers was a gentleman named Bob Davies. He’s the author of several great books including the “1.2% Factor” and “The Sky is not the Limit, You are,” One of the key points in his lecture is that mankind does not tolerate exceptional, talented people very well. If you take a good hard look you’ll see systems in our public schools for example promoting “completion scores instead of grades” and “Self Esteem programs” while encouraging everyone to be good little “Worker Bees,” in our society. This is nothing more than making sure everyone becomes a compliant part of the herd. And that noise you hear roaring up from behind you are all the countries that used to trail us in education and achievement rapidly catching and surpassing us with brighter, smarter kids that are being encouraged to study and excel. Today our education system is too concerned about not hurting someone’s feelings let alone encouraging them to excel. We certainly don’t want to give little Johnny a better grade than Tiffany because after all, boys and girls are equal in all things. Throughout the day, if you pay attention, you’re taught that this world is a nasty, unfair place and we’re all victims of this or of that. All through history the folks on the “Leading Edge” of thought were constantly criticized and derided, yet over time their thoughts, inventions and teachings have helped mankind out in a myriad of ways. People like the Wright Brothers, Henry Ford, and Thomas Edison were considered to be kooks yet look at what those kooks gave us!

I have become hyper-sensitive to what’s being dispersed in the media, whether it’s the ever increasing violence on TV, or the ever depressing headlines in the papers and national publications. If you really want to understand where we’re at and where we’re going as a society, do this the next time you’re at your local Supermarket. Take a look at the publications that are staring you in the face when you’re at the checkout counter. The titles are so revealing. “Octo Mom signs for multi millions,” “Patrick Swayze’s last dying request,” or “The Best Bikini Bodies.” Of course my favorite recurring title is which Hollywood movie actress has fallen victim to the dreaded “Cellulite problem” and now looks horrible in their bikini. Now that’s what I call “Importante.” Sorry, I thought a little Espanol’ was in order there!

There’s another thing that jumps out at me these days and it’s also revealing. It doesn’t matter whether you’re watching television, listening to the radio or reading a magazine there’s one commercial/ad after another touting this pill or that pill to solve our countless physical maladies. I especially love the commercials for Viagra, Cialis and Flomax. It’s about time they came to the rescue of us males. It’s comforting to know that if I take Viagra and Flomax I’m guaranteed wonderful sex with a gorgeous forty something year old woman and I get to enjoy my buddies more because I don’t have to spend as much time in the bathroom. At last, “True Liberation” for us guys. Here’s another thing that’s interesting. Why is there this ever expanding market for the pharmaceutical solutions to the problems that plague us? Could it be “The Laws of Attraction” at work here? There’s been a lot written lately about “You get more of what you focus on,” and I’m convinced the more we focus on health issues as we’re bombarded daily by commercial after commercial the more serious and frequent they become. I have made a conscious decision in my life to decrease significantly my exposure to TV and radio and the negative programming they offer. That’s what works for me.

Take a look around your world and determine whether it’s the way it’s portrayed in the media or whether, just maybe, it’s beautiful and wonderful to be a human being on this little blue planet. I personally think each and every day is a blessing all wrapped up and topped with a bow just for us. Count your many blessings and enjoy your life. I just love this quote from Rita Mae Brown;”I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it.” Here’s another one from John Lavenia; “You will never be more successful than your own self image.” As long as you continue to take in all the negative images and propaganda that’s being beamed at you daily, your own self image can’t help but suffer, which of course keeps you right where you belong, with the herd. The shame is everyone is born with special gifts and talents and it’s their responsibility to develop them and share them with their fellow man. So do yourself a favor and the next time you need a little entertainment, read a great personal development book or listen to some wonderful music, or heck, just go for a nice walk and take in what this talented little blue planet has to offer. The next time you’re in the checkout line at the supermarket you can simply close your eyes. Have a wonderful day!

Quote: Rita Mae Brown

2009-04-05T10:43:00.001-06:00

I finally figured out the only reason to be alive is to enjoy it.

They Call It Fear

2009-02-22T18:28:00.002-07:00

Last week as I was pondering a critical decision, a decision that I had not come to terms with in almost two years, I suddenly found myself gripped by fear. The decision involved my attending a three day seminar in Mexico that I truly wanted to experience. My dilemma was the $4,000 required to register along with the travel and hotel accommodations. I of course was focused on the “perceived” sorry state of my finances at the time and the monkey chatter in my head was deafening. I had wrestled with the decision the week before and finally decided that “Yes, YES” I was going. After reaching my decision I still put off registering and the actual writing of the check for another week. Now the timeline was beginning to push back and I had after all, “Committed” to going. I finally pulled the event up on my computer and started to register only to realize that the cost was actually $1,000 more than I thought it was. My $4,000 hurdle was actually a $5,000 hurdle.

Well, this minor little fact tipped me over and I again put off the inevitable for one more day knowing that the facts and circumstances would be no different the following morning. The next day dawned gloomily after a fitful night of sleep. I got up, showered and sat down with my morning cup of coffee and watched my favorite morning sports show, which lately had become nothing more than one commercial after another and very little about sports. The fear I was feeling was real and as I sat there I realized that that was what my life had been reduced to lately, surmounting one fear after another, while always peeking out from behind a place of false safety. I absolutely hated the feeling. Suddenly I was filled with a wave of nausea and I got up and hastily stumbled towards the bathroom making it only as far as the kitchen sink. There, hanging on for dear life, I heaved my guts out for the next fifteen minutes, whereupon my vision slowly took on the streaked lightning look of my now impending migraine. What in hell had just happened to me? In the course of a half hour I had been sick to my stomach and now was in the throes of a full blown migraine headache, and over what? Going to a conference and writing a check? The worst part of it was I actually had the money in the bank to do this thing I so desperately wanted to do.

I settled back down on my couch and after the worst of the migraine had passed I decided to break down the events that had led up to my wave of sickness. For example what caused me to be physically sick? Well, the answer to that was my fear of writing a check that the little voice in my head said I couldn't afford. But wait a minute! l actually could afford to write the check. The money was in the bank. Well yes, but the little voice in my head kept telling me I was being reckless and that if the scenario I was focusing on in my head actually occurred, followed by an even worse scenario I would end up penniless and out on the street. But wait a minute! Were any of the things that the little voice in my head was telling me an actual fact? Of course not! I had the money, the correct decision was to attend the conference and come hell or high water I wasn’t going to ever find myself out on the street. This was simply my mind creating doom and gloom from nothing. I was reminded of the Samuel Clemens quote, “I’ve had thousands of problems in my life, most of which never actually happened.”

As I sat there I realized that I had been waging a battle of epic proportions in my mind, one so great it had made me physically sick. Now that’s quite powerful, but powerful for all the wrong reasons. I felt silly, but I also realized that this condition had always been with me and had worsened as I had gotten older. My current situation and station in life was the culmination of the thoughts and decisions I had made up to that very moment. I wasn’t exactly happy with my current lot in life and I was serious about leaving old habitual ways of thinking behind. What was the driving force behind my thoughts up to that point in my life? The answer was fear, big bad “FEAR.” Just exactly what was "Fear" I asked myself? The answer was it really wasn’t anything. The fear that I felt pulse through me and the sickness that followed was based on my mind conjuring up all sorts of calamities that simply didn’t exist. This fear was nothing more than the ether located between my ears. It only existed because I fed it the fuel it needed to exist with my misguided thoughts of what might happen, which of course only invited the nonexistent occurrences to actually manifest themselves into reality. Hell, if I could so skillfully create crappy things like that, things that made me physically sick, why the hell couldn’t I focus those thoughts on great things like abundance and success? Now I was really on to something! It boggles the mind to think of what we do to ourselves when we operate from a position of fear. We’re afraid of what others might think. We’re afraid to look bad in front of others. We’re afraid to fail. We’re afraid of what others might say. We’re afraid we’ll let someone down. We’re afraid we’ll look stupid and possibly inferior to our peers. On and on it goes until we’re frozen in place, resentful, desperate and angry. We hear people bemoan the fact that “If they had it to do over again they would have done this or that thing differently.” We also hear people say, “Where have the years gone, I mean only yesterday I was on top of my game and now look at me!”

Well, Life is short and I’m determined to not feed this nonexistent thing called fear again. I truly know that each person’s life situation is completely determined by their thoughts and decisions and never by outside forces or circumstances. I read the other day in "The Travelers Gift" by Andy Andrews the following: “All men are driven by faith or fear-one or the other-for both are the same. Faith or Fear is the expectation of an event that hasn’t come to pass or the belief in something that cannot be seen or touched. A man of fear always lives on the edge of insanity. A man of faith lives in perpetual reward.” Each and every one of us has unlimited potential and it’s virtually a sin not to reach and achieve that full potential. I also know that each and every last one of us can achieve the success and the abundance we strive for if only we focus on what it is we want and not on what we don’t want which of course feeds that thing called fear. I made a vow that day that I was never, ever going to make myself sick again based on a set of circumstances that I created in the “virtual reality” of my mind. I vowed that I was going to pursue my dreams, that I was going to serve my fellow man and I was damn determined to have fun along the way. I had wasted way too much time worrying about what others might think. To hell with them! I have asked that little voice in my head to please “Shut up and don’t come around anymore!” From now on I’m only going to listen to the little voice located in my heart because I know that’s the voice I can trust. Only in your heart do you truly know who you are. Don’t let something that doesn’t exist, except in your mind, derail you from achieving your dreams and becoming the great person you know you can be.

Fitness at your Feet

2009-01-31T16:09:00.001-07:00

That’s right, a major opportunity to become just a bit more fit is right there at your feet. The next time you’re looking for a little inspiration and need a motivated work out partner to get you going, you’ll probably find the perfect solution right there next to you, tail wagging, ready to take you for a nice long walk. No matter the time of day our canine friends are up to the task. You’ll find them more than willing to lead you around the neighborhood doubling as your enthusiastic personal tour guide while constantly pointing out the sights and smells, especially the smells of your little community. Your newly appointed coach will enthusiastically lead you along while you, at first huffing and puffing, slowly whip yourself back into shape.

Walking is an excellent low intensity form of exercise and it’s great for your heart, for toning and strengthening your legs and steadily building up your endurance and stamina. As your conditioning and pace improves you will also start removing those unwanted pounds you’ve been noticing, which is your ultimate reward for your dedication, persistence and hard work. Sometimes though we need a little additional motivation and let’s face it, dogs love to go for walks, the longer the better as far as they’re concerned. I mean the next time you’re driving along on a nice day check out all the human/dog walking teams and I guarantee you the dogs will all be adorned with big smiles on their faces. Their human tag team partner’s expression will be somewhere between happy and smiling to grim determination as they struggle to keep up with their highly energetic companions. Dogs also have no problems with multi-tasking, so besides being your Personal Fitness Coach they’ll happily take on the additional roles of Social Interaction Expert and as discussed earlier your friendly Neighborhood Tour Guide. You don’t even need to increase their salaries although a well placed scratch, and the occasional biscuit is greatly appreciated.

Becoming more fit means you will have more energy for your job and plenty left over to enjoy your family when you get home. It means fewer health issues and you’ll look and feel better about yourself both personally and professionally. Then there are all the additional benefits that the hard working, multi-tasking dog will provide. Are you a little shy when it comes to meeting new people? No problem, because your dog isn’t and they will joyfully introduce you to lots of new people and not a few great dogs. They’re regular social butterflies with “Packs are good” attitudes! There’s also the laughter they’ll provide as they enthusiastically go about living life in the moment. It’s been proven that laughter is as beneficial to your health as the forty five minute walk you just completed. I defy anyone to stifle at least a small smile if not totally crack up when watching man’s best friend go through the highly ritualistic Potty Spot Dance. There’s the sniff and careful circling of a potential dumping zone, a re-check of the preferred location, some additional sniffing and one final grand circle to double check location and distance to aiming point. Finally, satisfied that this is indeed “The Spot,” there’s the awkward squat with the “Bombs Away” look on the face. Sure you have to pick it up, but wasn’t it worth the laugh you got watching the contortions and silly facial expressions. Come on, it was worth it wasn’t it?

Finally there’s one more great benefit and that’s the health and fitness of your willing and loyal companion. While you were whipping yourself into shape, your dog was doing the same, along with always keeping a wary eye out for you. Sadly our four legged friends will only live to be maybe twelve or thirteen years old before they leave us. A dog that’s been lovingly cared for and properly exercised means a healthy, active older dog, rather than an overweight, arthritic one with all the accompanying health issues. You see, it’s a team effort! While your new coach is helping you get fit, you’re doing the same for him and let’s face it, a well exercised dog is also a tired dog and as the old saying goes, “A tired dog is a good dog.” I mean look, isn’t your Yellow Lab just beautiful lying over there in front of the fire place snoozing away? Why it’s a picture right out of an outdoor magazine and when they’re asleep they’re not chewing on your shoes or knocking over the garbage can. So go grab your four legged best friend and get out there and go for a walk. Here are a few helpful tips to guide you along:

· Buy a Fanny Pack and secure the dog’s leash to the Fanny Pack. This means your dog, especially if he or she is big and robust, will be connected and controlled by your torso. This will be much easier on you and the dog will be unable to twist you into a human pretzel when it smells an especially aromatic smell. This is especially beneficial if you’re smaller in stature, for instance a small female with a big male dog.

· Make sure you’re equipped with good shoes, preferably walking shoes or cross trainers. Good shoes will absorb plenty of the shock while you’re walking and that’s good for your ankles, knees, and hips. If you have been walking over a period of time and all of a sudden you notice that you’re knees or hips are starting to get a little sore, it probably means the shoes are wearing out and they need to be replaced.

· Wear reflective clothing in the evening so that the ever present motorist can clearly see you. You can even purchase reflective collars and leashes at your favorite pet store and in that way you and your four legged mate are lit up like a ship in the night for everyone to see. But please, spare them the goofy, cutesy clothing remembering that they also take great pride in their appearance and don’t wish to be elves or reindeer.

· Make sure the Fanny Pack has a water bottle for you, a couple of treats for your Fitness Coach to use when teaching him or her some good walking manners like heeling at intersections or not jumping up on people and most important, plastic bags to clean up after your four legged pal.

I hope this has been helpful and I do encourage you to get out there and walk with your best friend or friends. As a veteran of over 8,000 miles of trailing behind two happy behinds and their wagging tails I can tell you it is well worth it.

An Interesting Read

2009-01-14T19:00:00.003-07:00

When I was reading T Harv Eker’s “Secrets of the Millionaire Mind,” he made a point of saying he loved listening to great athletes and famous celebrities being interviewed because there were always some great nuggets you could learn from them. So I started focusing on these interviews when they presented themselves. I noticed right away that there was a common thread running through the interviews and it didn’t matter whether the person was an athlete or a leading entertainer or a visionary in the business world. These individuals were all forward focused and spoke of their goals, their gratitude at what they had achieved and they each had a strong desire to give back.

The other day I was at the local Super Market and I found myself looking at the endless magazine offerings. I was looking for some ideas for my current ad campaign on Google, so I grabbed the January edition of Esquire Magazine and tossed it into the cart along with the Starkist Tuna and Fritos corn chips. What I didn’t realize at the time was this particular edition had fifty interviews with fifty celebrities, one from each State in the US. Of course ole Clint Eastwood was on the cover, but there were an incredible array of people ranging from Chuck Yeager, Pilot Extraordinare to Alice Cooper, the Shock Rock Artist. As I plunked down in bed that bight I decided to take a look at a couple of interviews before I got real serious and read an investment magazine.

An hour and a half later I was still reading the interviews and they were fascinating, even the Paris Hilton interview. That’s right, even Paris Hilton was fascinating especially when she said, “I always knew since I was a little girl that I wanted to be a blond icon.” Of course that’s exactly what she is for the better or worse of mankind. As I read the interviews I couldn’t help but notice how many of them knew exactly what they wanted to be and how they focused on that until it became true. Too many of us, and that includes yours truly are focused on “Not Failing,” or “Becoming what others (Parents, friends, spouses) tell us we should be,” and worse yet, “Ignoring the tug and pull of our gut and refusing to follow our personal vibrational tuning fork.” Then we sit around and wonder why in the hell we’re unhappy and at times even unhealthy. Why is it, that time just flies by when we’re doing something we’re passionate about and then it drags when we’re at work or in an environment we don’t want to be in? It’s those rascally vibrations raising their “we can’t help it, this is who I am,” cellular red flags. So I’d encourage you to not only read this month’s edition of esquire but also focus on reading and listening to what the famous people have to say. There’s a message in there that’s loud and clear: BE WHO YOU ARE, and life and success will flow your way.

Here are a few quotes I found interesting.
Clint Eastwood: “Even in grammar school they taught you to go with your first impression. It’s like multiple choice questions. If you go back and start dwelling, you’ll talk yourself out of it and make the wrong pick. That’s just a theory. I’ve never seen any studies on it, but I believe it.”

Alice Cooper: “God gives you a life and says, Okay, what are you going to do with it?”

Larry Bird: “The best basketball announcer is one who allows you to close your eyes.”

Phillip Glass: “I always knew what I wanted to do and I did it.”

“What I’ve noticed is that people who love what they do, regardless of what that might be, tend to live longer.”

“Motivation will make up for a lot of failings.”

Kimberly Roberts: “When fear sets in, you’re lost, you’re beat.”

Chuck Klosterman: “When I read criticism, I never learn anything about the record or the movie or the book. I mostly learn about the writer.”

Brent Scowcroft: “History has a way of happening.”

Jesse Jackson: “Success needs no explanation. Failure does not have one that matters.”

Rulon Gardner: “You gotta live to live.”

George Johnson: “I built this house in 56. I was scared of heights, so I shingled the roof after dark.”

Charles Koch: “Adversity is a lot easier to overcome than success.”

Bob Newhart: “There’s gratification in making somebody laugh. It’s a wonderful sound. I find myself, to this day, doing it, wanting to make people laugh.

Wealth Of Knowledge

2008-12-30T11:57:00.008-07:00

I’m continually amazed at how much information is available to us today if we just take a little time to sit down and absorb it. I’m glad I was born into my own particular generation, before the advent of the computer. Beginning with Melville’s Moby Dick I developed a true love of books and I still read two to three books every month. Because I’m a tad scattered, I’ll actually read certain books two or three times. I want the information to soak into my cells and make sure “I get it!”

A couple of years ago after a failed marriage and finding myself indentured to a sweat equity group in the restaurant industry I got involved with my own personal development. If I have a positive trait, it’s that I’m honest with myself and I realized early on that pointing fingers at other people never helped me solve my own problems. I also realized that if I was going to make any inroads with the character known to everyone as “Bill” I’d have to stand in front of a mirror. Then and only then would I have a chance to make progress because the operative word in the previous sentence was "OWN." The guy in the mirror was responsible for my problems, not someone else. During the two years I’ve read close to thirty books on personal development and there are even days where I think I’m making progress. Of course, being human and worse yet, “Irish” there are days where I still get to sit in my very own personal development corner with my dunce cap on. Those days generally follow a particularly good “Pity Party” I had for myself or when my “Infamous Temper” makes an appearance to remind me it’s still a viable part of the family. But on the whole I am slowly making progress and moving forward.

One of the things I became fascinated with were the constant references to the “Laws of Attraction.” I am a very skeptical person and when I first started to hear folks talk about it my natural reaction was to shoot holes in the concept and be done with it. Oddly enough though, the more I read, the more it made sense. Even stranger, the more I examined my own life, the more obvious and logical it became. I could literally examine my thoughts during certain periods of my life and see the parallels everywhere. My God! I really was creating my life, sometimes for the good, sometimes more recently for the bad. The other thing I noticed was that the successful people I observed, whether they were in business, sports or the personal development authors that I was reading, they all referenced this law, “The Law of Attraction.” The common threads were “You get what you’re focused on,” “Gratitude,” and “Giving.” The message was always the same, just packaged differently.

I have a list of some of my favorite books on this site that I would highly recommend. My favorites however are pictured above. Of this group I’ll admit the offering from Jerry and Esther Hicks, “The Laws of Attraction,” (The Teachings of Abraham) resonate with me. ME! Imagine a book about a group of non physical beings speaking through a lady named Esther Hicks all the while her husband Jerry transcribes away. I just knew I wouldn’t believe a word of it and now I’ve read the book and subsequent offerings by the Hicks several times. It just makes so damn much sense that a classic naysayer like me can’t find any flaws what so ever in the theory. Now, obviously, that’s what I’ve enjoyed reading and studying and maybe it’s not something you can buy into. It doesn’t matter, because there are plenty of great books with a lot of helpful information in them that you can buy into. So, if you’re looking to do a little tweaking on yourself going into 2009, take a look at a couple of the books I’ve listed above and see what you think. Oh, and I’m currently listening to “Think and Grow Rich,” by Napoleon Hill on CD. For those of you that just don’t enjoy reading, go buy yourself a Bose Head Set and just sit back and hit “Play.” It’ll be well worth it.

Merry Christmas

2008-12-16T13:48:00.000-07:00

The City and County Building in Denver is an absolute must see this time of year.
Image taken with a Canon D-30 20x35 wide angle lens by BK.

GRIEF

2008-11-01T09:56:00.000-06:00

I tried to think of a clever title for this article and came up empty. Grief? Merriam Webster says it’s; “a deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement.” There is simply nothing good about grief. Something bad has happened to cause it and it almost always involves somebody you loved having passed on. I bring this up because last week a lady I know of, but not personally, lost her Mother to cancer. Upon hearing the news I was plunged instantly into the personal dilemma of my own grief that quite frankly I thought had long since passed.

I had for the most part in my life been fortunate in the grief department. For the first forty four years of my life I never experienced it. I had a class mate die once while I was in High School, a suicide victim, but he was an odd kid and it was just weird and spooky, certainly not something that plunged me into any kind of grief. Of course my Grandma Smith passed on, but she was in her nineties and I had only seen her a couple of times those last few years, so again I was spared this malady called grief. Then it happened. My father, a robust Iowa milk hauler was just a couple of years into a well deserved retirement when he was diagnosed with Colon cancer. He was given two weeks to two months to live and our family was tossed into utter chaos. I so admired this stoic, hard working man, “My Father,” and as a young man I desperately wanted to have a closer relationship. It never happened. He was either working or too damn tired to do that bonding stuff. We didn’t have a drink together, we never played catch and he wasn’t very huggable. Finally I left and went far away to pursue the American Dream. So I was forced to watch from afar this man, “My Father,” age twenty five years and shrink into a skeleton like mask. The few times I saw him, I hardly recognized him. Unfortunately the dark drama lasted for two years, not two months.

I had traveled back to Iowa, a mere fourteen hour trip that February, to say good-bye to my father. Miracles were out of the question and he had been sent home to die. I made a terrible mistake at this point in time by listening to my favorite CD on the way out. It was a KD Lang CD and I loved it. Upon arriving I spent three painful days not knowing what to say to him and stressed to the max. My childhood home was constantly filled with guests going through some macabre ritual where people come in and say light hearted, funny things that fall thud on the floor from the utter awkwardness of the moment. Finally the morning arrived where I had to leave and return to Denver. We both knew that this would be it. As I got up that morning I grabbed some of my belongings to take down stairs to be loaded in my car. As I started down the steps I heard my Dad’s voice from his bedroom and he said, “Goodbye son.” I was devastated! MY God, he thought I was LEAVING and I wasn’t going to say GOODBYE to him? I immediately said, “Dad, I’ll be right back, I’m not leaving.” I returned and held my Father in my arms and bade him a very tearful goodbye. That was at that time, the hardest thing I ever had to do in my life. I squeezed him one last time, looked into his eyes and then walked out of the room and set a record for sobbing in a car. I was inconsolable from Eastern Iowa to Lincoln, Nebraska where I finally stopped, totally spent and got a motel room and just sat there and bawled like a child. My Father passed away four days later. OK, what’s my point?

Well it took me years to get over the loss of my Father. I have never listened to that KD Lang CD since and just being ambushed by the song “Constant Craving” causes me to lose it. My wife has seen it happen with her own two eyes. Here’s where I become confused about grief. Fast forward nine years and I’m in the Minneapolis Airport and my cell phone rings. It was my wife Laurel and she said five simple words, “Gator (My nickname) your Mother has died.” My wife, God Bless her, was a financial person. They tend to get right to the point. There was no, “Hey the weather back here has been crappy, by the way your Mother died, you OK?” No, she got right to it. I sat there among a bunch of strangers, twenty minutes away from boarding the plane, stunned, but quite calm. On the two hour flight back to Denver I sat quietly in my seat and absolutely nothing happened. I attended the funeral, buried her and still nothing! I assumed this would be one of those events where two Months down the road, on a single solitary day, maybe at the Supermarket, where all of a sudden a wave of emotion would wash over me and I would be standing in the toiletries aisle wailing away, but it never happened. What the hell was wrong with me? I loved my Mother and we had a great relationship. Hell, I had even bought her a house so that she could live comfortably and I called her every week to see how she was doing. I did not shed a tear, ever. That bothered me to no end and I tried so very hard to understand what happened. I was closer to my Mother than I was to my Father and yet nary a tear. Then things got even stranger.

My wife and I are separated, so our two dogs lived with her. They were for all practical purposes, our kids and I would go over to her house three times a week and walk them and make sure they got plenty of attention. One day in August of 2007 I went over to walk them and my precocious twelve and half year old Yellow Lab Kiowa wasn’t walking. I immediately knew this wasn’t good. I briefly walked her step brother, returned and then after consultations with the Mrs. took her to my place for the week-end to watch over her. The dog would not walk! She just lay there and panted heavily. When I went up to her she would try so damn hard to please me and she’d desperately struggle to get up. She couldn’t and it just about killed me. I had to wrap a towel around her mid-section and lift all eight five pounds of her and take her outside so she could pee. I lay there beside her for two straight nights and listened to the labored breathing and felt absolutely helpless. To keep her hydrated; I would wet my hands and let her lick the moisture from them. I smeared food on my fingers and let her lick the food, anything to get her to eat. I also played Beethoven to comfort her. That Monday we loaded her in the car and took her to the Vet where they promptly took her in on a stretcher. I sat there as the vet looked at her and I watched her shiver, the poor dog seemed so alone. Did she think I was going to just leave her like my Dad did? She just lay there. Damn it, Damn it! Damn It!! Why can’t you do anything for her? “DO SOMETHING!” The nice lady Vet gave us the look and we nodded our heads and I watched as she inserted the needle and then watched Kiowa stop shivering and the life go out of her eyes and I died just a little that day. Damn it, she was just a dog! A troublesome dog at that! What’s wrong with me? Where were those tears when my Mom died?

I now had experienced three deaths, deaths that were close to me and I was beyond consolable twice and quite fine when my Mom passed. The news last week that this gal I know had lost her Mother caused me to return to the scene of the crime and ponder how a 59 year old adult male could sob over the death of his dog, but not his Mother and then it finally hit me. After the death of my Father my Mother had made it very clear she was miserable without him and she constantly talked about death and being with my Dad once again. She really missed him. When she died, it was from a stroke and according to the coroner she never knew what hit her. She never suffered for one second and I always knew she was happy and had joined my Father on another spiritual plane. I sensed she was quite tickled about the whole set of affairs. I’m sorry, but if she’s happy, then I'm happy. Grief? For me grief is watching somebody or something you love suffer and there’s nothing, absolutely nothing you can do for them but give them your love until they’re gone. It’s painful when you want to help and even more painful if ever in YOUR own mind you think, “that THEY think, “You’re leaving them without ever saying goodbye. It’s doubly painful when you’re forced to play God and nod your head. I can finally forgive myself now, but I’ll never, ever listen to Beethoven again! I don’t think I like grief very much, it’s like so much wasted music.

Drifting

2008-10-23T11:02:00.000-06:00

One day not far removed from my fifty ninth birthday I realized I was drifting. It was a strange sensation for someone that had always defined his life by the job titles he held, the take home pay he deposited, the woman he called his wife and the very car he drove. Why, I’d always had money in my pocket and I driven home every night to a beautiful new home.

I looked around the other day and realized I was drifting, drifting on a funny sort of “Life raft." The home was no longer new; as a matter of fact I was now called a "RENTER." The job titles no longer applied and when I called out her name there was no wife to be found. She had left and taken the dog. So I decided to walk away from the job I despised and I embarked on a forced march to perfection. She had done the forcing so by golly I decided I would get into the personal development industry and then once I was completely fixed (I estimated that would take thirty to forty days give or take a meditation or two) I would set the world on fire and make a few million bucks in the process. I would do what I always did, I would succeed, another challenge surmounted.

So what the hell was I doing drifting? I realized that my original estimate of perfection might have been a bit overly optimistic. I now had adjusted my “Bliss O Meter” to something approaching the rest of my life time and quite possibly beyond that. Hmm, can you actually become a better spiritual person after you’re dead? I’ve been told that’s how it works. I hate to admit it, but for such a successful guy I sure was carrying around a lot of baggage. I should have worked for the airlines. Rather than being easy my personal development journey was actually quite tough. I realized that I wasn’t just drifting three years ago; I was actually plunging straight down through some pretty formidable rapids. I was getting soaked, but not from the rapids but my own sweat. I mean, have you ever seen the guy in the circus that balances those saucers on the end of a stick? There comes a point where he frantically races from one stick to the next stick trying to keep the saucers balanced and spinning. Well, that’s where I had gotten in my life.

It was tough admitting that the worried scared guy looking back at me in the mirror yesterday was the same guy that ten years earlier considered himself to have arrived, whatever the hell that meant. Now here I was 361 days from my SIXTIETH birthday and I was drifting. I felt like a Labrador caught between two muddy ponds. I didn’t know which way to turn. I was becoming an expert on the “Laws of Attraction.” Why, whatever I worried about and obsessed over came true immediately. It truly was magical, except in my case it was more like “Black Magic.” Damn it, “Bliss” was supposed to be easy. Everybody was doing it, finding their “Bliss.” Where in the heck was my Bliss? I looked over there and all I saw was drifting. I looked under there and just found more drifting. There were days my life felt like fresh snow in the middle of an Iowa blizzard. I just kept drifting.

Then, I had a different kind of thought. I mean, I really was learning a lot about myself. I had a bunch of new friends and they genuinely seemed to enjoy my company. I was writing and although not yet nominated for a Pulitzer, I sure did enjoy doing it. My photography skills had soared and next summer I would be studying with my favorite photographer in a great work shop environment high in the Rockies. I was writing my silly screen play and fussing and fussing over it. I had summited three times last summer and was very proud of the fact I still could scurry up the side of a Colorado Mountain. I even had a little girl from Guatemala named Hilaria that I was helping with food and schooling. Why, I was her "Sponsor" and very proud of my role in her life! I realized I wasn’t drifting so much as my life and priorities had changed dramatically. Today, I could care less about a job title unless it was as an honorary chief in the Sioux Indian Nation. Car? My 4-Runner was just fine thank you very much. Heck, my little rental keeps me warm and I just might buy it one of these days. I was now inches away from earning a great living, I just needed to stop the “Fretting” and simply start focusing on the “Receiving.” All the ground work was already in place. When you’ve lived your entire life frenetically chasing the dreams of others while all the time being miserable to the core it’s hard to recognize the “Good Life.” It’s so different and stress free you just might mistake it for drifting.

Now if you’ll excuse me, my wife has invited me over to her place for dinner.

Channeling Aggression

2008-10-11T10:00:00.000-06:00

The following case study has been compiled from notes and analysis supplied by yours truly through the summer of 2008. It is an exhaustive exercise in how to channel aggressive energy. The creature involved in this case study shall be referred to as; “You little Bleepty Bleep!” The area of study is confined to my bird feeder and back yard. I felt compelled to share this clinical information with you to help you deal with your aggressive tendencies and allow you to channel ill will and anger fluidly and easily through back yard exercise. So let me begin.

I took my position next to the dish rack and slowly peered out my kitchen window and began my daily search for the evil creature that had been causing me great angst. I had set the trap earlier in the morning and had a knowing that this time I would defeat him fair and square in the field of battle. The hose was hooked up and the high velocity nozzle attached. I had checked and double checked for any kinks and was confident that I could loose a fusillade of water on my nemesis if and when he attempted his daily raid. Dressed in my combat chartreuse colored bath robe with matching slippers I gripped the old tennis shoe as tightly as one would a hand grenade. My breath was slow and controlled and the window freshly cleaned for maximum vision. There were two finches on the bird feeder and the wind was from left to right and the leaves gently shimmered. If I knew the “little Bleepty Bleep,” he’d be along shortly. I ran quickly through the routine. The patio door was unlocked and this time the screen pulled back. That had been an expensive lesson. My field of fire was clear and a second old tennis shoe was stock piled on the potting table just outside the patio door. Today was going to be the day I broke through.

Then I noticed an unnatural movement in the tree. A branch had moved right to left. I hunkered down and felt the tennis shoe in my hand. It’s amazing what happens to a fifty nine year old man when the adrenalin starts to kick in. I could barely feel the pulled back muscle incurred six months ago while drying my soup bowl. I don’t know how many times I had dried that bowl using that same toweling method, but it was a severe pull. My muscles were taut and I felt like I was twenty again and then, there he was. He was eying my bird feeder and I could almost reach out and touch the beady eyed “Little Bleepty Bleep.” Then I noticed the tail flinch. That was a bad sign as his radar had picked me up. He stared at the feeder and then looked at me. What was he doing? Then it dawned on me. He was calculating. Yes, he was calculating how many black oiled sun flower seeds he could consume before I burst out the patio door! Why the devious “Little Bleepty Bleep had been timing me like a first base coach times a pitcher's move to home plate. I had seen the stop watch wrapped around his left paw last week and hadn’t made the connection. Screw it. The victory would go to the aggressor and I was THE AGGRESSOR today! I leapt toward the door. Yes indeed, a highly athletic fifty nine year old man can still "leapt" when he puts his mind to it.

I burst out the door at the very moment the “Little Bleepty Bleep” had hurled his body upon my bird feeder and I fired the tennis shoe in his direction just missing him. I felt a very sharp pain in my shoulder, but wounds in combat were a part of this business so I sallied forth, right arm dangling at my side. The “Little Bleepty Bleep had leapt (His leapt was better than mine) into the tree and then he made a crucial mistake. He headed up the tree and as soon as he was at the top you could see look on his face, the “Aw Damn” expression as he looked back down and saw my sardonic grin. I turned the hose on and let him have it. He started down and then hesitated and I nailed him practically knocking him out of the tree. Fear gripped those beady little eyes all the while I chased his miserable little ass about the tree. Panicked, he made a run for it and dove for the ground. As an expert marksman I tracked him all the way down to the ground and gave pursuit. The “Little Bleepty Bleep” was fast but the adrenalin had converted me into an automated killing machine. Then I made my first tactical error.

I forgot the hose was attached to the hose bib which was connected to a very heavy house, a house that outweighed me considerably. My good left arm was yanked violently and I twirled in a death spiral to the ground like a fallen gun fighter albeit in a chartreuse robe with matching slippers. As I lay there it did occur to me that the neighbor lady across from my back yard was turning to her husband over a delicious cup of coffee and saying, “Harry, the back yard lunatic is at it again. Oh my, he doesn’t wear underwear!”

I looked up at the fence and the “Little Bleepty Bleep” sat there, wet and angry. He knew how close he had come to being had and he was all bent out of shape. He started that tail flipping barking routine and I can only imagine the vile expletives being hurled my way. I gingerly picked myself up off the wet grass and went to the hose bib and turned it off. I made a mental note that the hose was thirty feet in length and factored that into my next encounter. I felt I had won the day. I went back inside and helped myself to four Ibuprofens and headed for a well deserved shower. I probably needed to abandon the chartreuse robe and maybe search for a pair of camouflage pajamas. I didn’t want the neighbor lady to know more than she needed to know about me. After a good shower I ventured triumphantly into the kitchen for a well deserved second cup of coffee. There was a movement to my left outside the window. Why that damn “Little Bleepty Bleep” was hanging upside down on my bird feeder stuffing his face. I whirled and headed for the patio door!

Trigger

2008-10-10T14:25:00.000-06:00

The other day I was talking on the phone to one of my ex-wives. All right, I heard that. You can stop chuckling and listen up for a second, OK? We were talking about how both of us have changed over the years. At first it was an awkward conversation because she was playing a Sheryl Crowe CD in the background. The song blaring away was “You were my favorite mistake.” I’m not sure if she did that intentionally, but it did have me on my heels for a second. We were married young and the marriage lasted all of seven years. The woman on the phone wasn’t the woman that I had fallen in love with as a young man, but then she was 57 seven years old so what did I expect? People change over time, everyone that is except me. We were having a very nice conversation surprisingly for a pair of X’s when she brought up the subject of politics and asked me my opinion of Sarah Palin. WHOA! Within seconds a full scale argument broke out, she wishing to lynch Ms. Palin and I, the conservative Independent, defending the lady from Alaska. The conversation was quite heated between two people that were BOTH registered as INDEPENDENTS! When the smoke had finally settled and I did what men the world over always do, “admitted how wrong I was, “we sat back and went “Wow,” what was that all about? What had happened was she had “Triggered” a response in me and I in return had triggered a response in her that lead to a full scale argument about that which we’re still not even sure of. Fortunately, the conversation ended on a pleasant note and we both committed to never ever discussing politics again. I believe that’s the 19th item we’ve added to our ever expanding list.

So, what the hell happened? How did a perfectly pleasant conversation do a 360 so fast? Obviously she said something to me that “Hit my switch.”Let’s talk about what I call a “Trigger.” Of course I’m not talking about Roy’s horse and for those born after 1980 Google Roy Rogers and you’ll figure it out. I remember getting off the phone and feeling very unsettled about what had transpired. I consider myself smart, well read and certainly in touch with my feminine side, albeit “Conservative” feminine side. Within seconds of her commenting negatively on Ms. Palin I was bug eyed, yelling and drooling out of the side of my mouth. Gee whiz, that’s not very intellectual. I’ll bet Plato never did that! I started to focus on the things in my life that “Trigger” my bad behavior and I vowed I was going to work on it. Let’s face it, we all like to be in control and I was on “Nut Control” when she hit my trigger. So I started to look around and by golly, there were several “Triggers” that I had to own up to.

Let’s see if any of these sound familiar. There’s the individual in a car that either cuts you off, turns in front of you, or slowly, but surely ventures into your lane all while happily talking on their cell phone. Why it happened to me just last night. I had the green arrow and this guy still turned in front of me and swerved into my lane. I honked my horn and did the bug eyed drooling thing. Now do you suppose he said to himself, “Gee, that’s Bill and I was discourteous to him and from now on I’m going to commit myself to being a more thoughtful, courteous driver.” Of course he didn’t. He didn’t think anything because people that do things like that never think to begin with! So what was I thinking? YES, of course, you’re right! I wasn’t thinking either, just reacting and drooling and raising my blood pressure. How about this? The long line at the post office. You’ve got a package that you’re mailing to Guatemala and you would need at least two semesters of “Postal Automation” to be able to use their EASY to use automated postal machine, so you wait in line. There are at least fifteen other people with packages also going to somewhere in South America, each of them ashamed they can’t use the automated machine either and we're all at the mercy of the two completely bored postal employees both of whom look suspiciously like they’re from South America to begin with. Finally a customer finishes and what happens? Yes, the guy or gal walks away from their window and goes in back. It’s “Trigger” time and again, a golden Palomino isn’t about to show up. I and at least three others start getting bug eyed and drooling from the mouth. Now I ask you, do you think anybody care’s? Do you suppose there’s someone on the cameras working for the Postal Department going, “Hey look, it’s Bill and he’s getting up-set. We better get someone down there fast!” Ya right and “Pigs Fly.” No, all that’s occurred is I’ve jumped out of gear, raised my blood pressure, lowered my life expectancy and became a story later on about, “You should have seen this one guy in line, boy was he pissed!” I could go on as I must confess to having a kind of “Trigger Club” of which I’m president, but I’d just be belaboring the point. I just know that it’s not something I like about myself and I’m determined to eradicate it from my other-wise witty, glowing Irish persona.

The first thing one has to do to combat this is to obviously be aware you’re doing it in the first place and note the times that you fall into the trap. When I react to something now, like a non attentive driver the first thing I do is take the finger I used to use to salute him with and I tap my forehead with it and say ”Stop it.” The next thing I do is start focusing on something pleasant and then begin taking gentle, deep breaths. Finally, the following day when I make quiet time for myself I have a brief review of the incident and ask myself whether I could have handled the situation differently. I ask myself on a scale of one to ten just how serious the incident was. I think I ranked one the other day a monstrous two. I also ask myself whether what happened the previous day had any impact on my current day. Usually the only impact it had is my embarrassment at how I responded and the knowledge that at times I’m not in control. Finally, I read and continually try to educate and mold the human named Bill in the hope that someday he will indeed be someone I can be proud of. The fact I’m working on this is proof that immersing myself in personal development is working, slowly, but working nonetheless. Now I think I’ll go for a drive, G’Day.

Rear View Mirror

2008-09-24T16:20:00.000-06:00

I caught myself thinking this morning and with such an important and rare event under way, I decided I would record my thoughts to see if they made any sense later on. I was pondering the word LOVE and realized that I had only experienced it a few times in my life in its purest form. As a “Recovering Human Being” and one prone to many personality afflictions that I’m working hard to over-come, I thought about how I’ve heard it described that the presence of love was like a light being turned on in the darkness. You’ve heard the expression, “She just lit up the room” when she entered. If we believe that everyone is a vibrating bundle of energy and that a loving individual vibrates at a much higher level, maybe we can understand how we can literally feel someone when they grace us with their presence. As a cranky, judgmental, and sometimes opinionated individual and recovering human I thought long and hard as to when I had felt or been exposed to genuine love in my life.

I can honestly say that on August 6th, 1994 when I was married to my wife in the Aspens atop Kenosha Pass in Colorado I felt honest and genuine, pure love. Why I swear the woman glowed like Glenn Close in the movie Field of Dreams as I looked into her eyes. I’ve never felt so light and free. Another observation of genuine love was my twelve year old yellow Lab that I lost last summer. I was exposed to her tremendous unabashed love every day of her life. I still miss her because I knew that no matter how bad my day was back then, she was there for me and loved me totally. But let me tell you about what happened to me one day in my Rear View Mirror.

This occurred ten years ago and it was during a time in my life when I was more than a little bit full of myself. I was the President of a restaurant franchise and in my late forties. I didn’t know it at the time, but I was in for some tough times ahead because of where I was as a person. I was more than a little opinionated and I could read you a long laundry list of things “I” didn’t care for or like. As a true fitness nut and someone that worked out daily I looked down on people that were obese as if they were lesser human beings. “HOW” could they let themselves get that way, I would wonder? So on that fateful day ten years ago I pulled up to a stop light and a small compact car pulled up behind me.

The lady driving the car was probably 240lbs and her boy, a twelve or thirteen year old sitting next to her was huge also. Right away the mean little mind in my head started. “Look at her! My God does she ever step away from the dinner table? My God, look at that kid of hers, he’s got to be 200 lbs himself.” Well as the mean little mind was saying these things the woman did the most amazing thing. She reached across with her hand and tousled her son’s hair and gazed at him with this amazing look of love. He in turn looked back at his Mom with a loving look that just doesn’t happen with boys that age. They paused for maybe two or three seconds smiling at each other and then looked forward in my direction.

I immediately felt like a rat hiding in the corner basement with a beam of light directed at me. I was so ashamed of myself I wanted to scurry some place, not because they knew what I was thinking, but because I knew in that instant, I was the lesser human being. It was a lesson in humility and one I’ve never forgotten. The beauty of any individual is on the inside, what’s in their soul, not how they look in a pair of designer jeans. I have never forgotten that moment or the way the lady had looked at her son. Now every time I feel a little judgmental I look within myself and remember when genuine love had shown brightly in my rear view mirror. Of course at that moment the light changed and while I was left with my chagrined thoughts I immediately swerved into another car’s lane. “You’re an idiot,” the guy screamed, “Why don’t you learn how to drive!” I guess that’s what they call my “Just Reward,” because in that instant, he was correct.

Bird Brains

2008-09-18T16:48:00.000-06:00

As human beings we tend to be somewhat judgmental of our fellow man/woman. I know that one of the areas that I work on constantly is my tendency to be overly critical of others. I keep wasting my time fuming over some minor transgression perpetrated on me by someone else. That little something they did that just tipped me over and boy that just wasn’t right, RIGHT?. You know what I mean, the guy that stands right in front of the weight rack and does his routine while the rest of us have to wait until his Royal Highness is finished before we too can work out, or the woman that sits in her car at a green light talking on her cell phone and all you’d like to do is proceed through the intersection, or the person that’s ahead of you in line that decides they’d like to carry on a fifteen minute conversation with the person you need to talk to and on and on. Sometimes being a human being with these darn flaws can be very discouraging, especially when the “OTHER HUMAN BEINGS” are so damn imperfect and maddening. But guess what? There’s hope for all of us! For I have just discovered that the animal world has the same problems that we do and I give as evidence the bird feeder and bird baths that sit outside my kitchen window.

Now if you have a bird feeder replete with multiple bird baths you have them for a reason. They are there so that you can watch the small colorful song birds eat and bath all the while serenading you with those incredible songs. Nothing beats the tunes that can be knocked out by a talented Finch, Thrush or Robin. Yet sadly, much to my horror I’ve discovered there are even issues within the bird world. One day I heard this noisy commotion and looked out my kitchen window and it was as if my bird feeder had been covered by black locust, except they were in actuality, Starlings. Now Starlings are from my observation loud, obnoxious and always thinking of themselves. Sing? Ha! They couldn’t carry a tune in a shower located in Ireland even after downing a shot of Irish whiskey! What was worse, they had driven off my well mannered, polite and courteous song birds.

Well, a battle ensued because It was my intent to feed proper birds and when I checked my list, Starlings weren’t on it. It took more than a week, but at last peace and a sense of order was restored and the acceptable birds were back. Then one day I looked out my kitchen window and, Oh my God, there were a dozen Grackels out there and they made the Starlings look like little Bird Scouts. They had a terrible propensity to poop everywhere and they didn’t feed at the bird feeder, no they gorged themselves not unlike human Barbarians standing before a pig on a spit. Well, once again a battle ensued and finally order again was restored. My little backyard had once more become my little Woodstock with my little winged Joe Cocker's belting out glorious music all day long. Well, what happened next took me truly by surprise.

I looked out my kitchen window and there was the unruly group of sparrows that normally roost in my front yard crab apple tree. My goodness, I’ve never seen such disregard for the “Pool Rules” than I was witnessing at that very moment. They were splashing each other, there were four of them in one bird bath alone and I swear one of them did a cannonball right in the middle of the group, clearly a violation of the “No Running, No Jumping” rule. How was I to know that sparrows are like those little kids down at the municipal pool that drive the life guard crazy and blue in the face from blowing their whistles? And they were just like kids because every time I went outside to explain the rules they high tailed it into the tree and when I went back inside they were right back at it.

I learned a valuable lesson that day. We will never be able to control the behavior of others in our human world and it’s a waste of valuable time and energy to try. We need to recognize that everyone has the right to create their own lives and if we focus on creating ours, the people we don’t want in them will simply not be there. Animals and humans have some of the same issues. We sometimes have to endure a few “Bird Brains” in life, so just keep on focusing on what you want to Be, Do and Have and all you’ll hear is beautiful music! Now excuse me, I need to go fill the bird bath again.

It’s Easy! Isn't It?

2008-09-15T16:36:00.000-06:00

Like many of you I’m working hard on my own personal development and at times coming up a tad short. That’s really what this blog is all about; “Personal Development for those that need training wheels.” Yup, there’s someone else out there stumbling and fumbling towards life’s goal line. I’ve discovered that after 59 years of being Bill and 30 years of being Bill in the restaurant industry I’ve developed a rather cynical, Murphy’s Law sort of “World View.” Throw in a couple of tough demanding parents and an amazing ability to over analyze everything I do and “Walla” you’ve got an individual that’s become very focused on what’s wrong, what’s missing and highly critical of himself. Of course that only compounds things and before you know it you’re in a downward spiral. Well, thank God I have a sense of humor! Thank God I’m able to laugh at myself when I look in the mirror, because without my daily chuckles and personal discussions with myself, I could really be in trouble!

One of the things I really enjoy is reading, both for pleasure and to educate myself and help me understand "Bill" a little better. Of all the really great books I’ve read, one that really stands out and I’m actually reading it for the third time right now is “The Laws of Attraction” The basics of the teachings of Abraham. Now what’s amazing to me is this is a book written by Esther and Jerry Hicks dealing with a non-physical intelligence called Abraham discussing the Laws of Attraction. Now remember I’m an analytical somewhat cynical character and if anything is going to get me on “The Skeptic Train” it would be this book right? Well actually the answer is “Wrong.” When I warily started reading the book, expecting to go “Aha, that’s a bunch of baloney and whistling the theme from the Twilight Zone,” I actually found that everything they discussed made absolute sense to me. I could not find one thing that they were teaching that didn’t satisfy my analytical senses and fulfill my need to be logical and practical. This particular book, in my case, had really gotten my attention and I was riveted to what it was telling me. I absolutely believed what they were teaching, which when boiled down to its simplest terms said, “You get what you focus on.” If you focused on your lack of anything or the things you didn’t want in your life you got more of it. However, if you focused on your goals and dreams and allowed nothing to come between you and your belief in their inevitability you would be successful. Now here’s what vexed me.

If I believe with all my soul that this is a magnificent universe in which everything vibrates and if I’m convinced how you feel and what you’re focused on will eventually be yours, both wanted and unwanted. AND, if I believe that the Law of Attraction works whether you believe in it or not, why then was I still spending so much of my time entwined with my negative dance partner, my limiting beliefs? Imagine my feelings this morning as I read the following passage: Once you have recognized that thinking of what you don’t want only attracts more of what you do not want into your experience, controlling your thoughts will not be a difficult thing, because your desire to do so will be very strong. Well, I’m analytical so I said to myself, “Easy for you maybe, but changing fifty nine years of habits and negative thought patterns is actually quite difficult!” Noooooo! Of course in saying that very thing I just made it a little more difficult because we get what we’re focused on. How can I keep doing this to myself? I believe you get what you focus on and yet every time I turn around I’m thinking about; “Living alone, or some driver that cut me off, or my lack of personal success, or where’d did this bill come from, and damn those telemarketing calls!” So what happens? Why I get showered with crazy bug eyed lunatic drivers each and every day, the only phone calls I get are telemarketers, not even real people but those little techno voices and my mailman comes to my front door and hands me a stack of bills because he can’t fit them in my mail box. Now I ask you, why would any sensible person do this to themselves, especially if they understood what was going on? Answer; I’m a work in progress and all the trials and tribulations that I’m going through now are valuable lessons on the road to achieving my dreams and actually evidence that I’m working on changing how I look at things right now.

So I start each day anew and give it the best I have. I quit being so darn critical of myself and I quit worrying about what others think. They can’t create in my life, only I can. I spend 45 minutes a day reading, meditating and going through my affirmations. By doing this it gets me into a better frame of mind each and every day. I spend my entire day looking for the positive things that are presented to me and I cease giving energy to what annoys me. Surprise, surprise, you slowly but surely start seeing more and more things that are positive and you begin to start counting your blessings. I've become more sensitive to how I feel inside and in so doing, I begin catching myself miscreating and focusing on my lack or on things I don’t want. In the beginning it happens a lot. But that’s actually healthy and the first step towards learning to think in terms of what you DO want and creating a positive and abundant life. Finally, I realize that all the analyzing, thinking of past mistakes, and finger pointing has gotten me exactly where I am today in my life. Why not try a different way of being? Why not take what I’ve learned, what I know and just run with it. My analytical mind tells me that the odds are, it’s the key to a happy abundant life.

Speaking of Fitness

2008-09-08T16:57:00.000-06:00

One very important aspect of our well being is how we feel about ourselves from a physical perspective. Now I don’t have a Masters in Sports Medicine or Kinesiology but I was a competitive weight lifter, I've climbed above 15,000 feet in the Andes, participated in yoga, I still actively lift weights, and I run a minimum of five miles a week on a treadmill. My degree I guess is in having been a fitness nut for more than thirty five years. Now I’m not talking about being so fit you can try out tomorrow for an “Iron Man’s” contest but rather fit in the sense that you have good muscle tone, flexibility and stamina. I’m also talking about maintaining a weight that’s comfortable for you. I’m a firm believer in a person’s weight is tied directly to whether they take in more or less calories than they burn up each day. In other words, if you want to lose weight you must exercise more and eat less. It’s really that simple. Remember a fit body is an efficient machine. It serves your confidence and gives you abilities you never knew you had. Eating well and exercising regularly are also ways to bring renewed energy and flow into your life.

So here’s my radical fitness program which requires an investment of five hours a week. That’s five hours out of the 168 that are available each week. I don’t care if you’re too fat or too skinny this five hour routine will help you feel better about yourself and get you into better shape.

. Three twenty minute walks a week. Depending on your level of fitness that’s two to three miles a week. There’s nothing better for the heart than a good brisk walk and you get to sight see and enjoy nature as an added bonus. If you have dog all the better. Exercise and companionship is good for the both of you!

· Two one hour classes a week devoted to either yoga or a low intensity Aerobics class. Couple this with those walks and you’re adding stamina and additional flexibility, especially if you opt for a good yoga class. Most health clubs offer these classes for free and a health club membership can cost as little as $39 a month. To me that’s an incredible investment.

· Light weight lifting and stretching twice a week for an hour each time. Whether you use some real light weights in your home that you've purchased from a sporting goods store or if you’re a member of a health club, this will help you gain strength and muscle tone. If you do belong to a club, they have a variety of machines that reduce the risk of injury while allowing you to exercise the various muscle groups in your body. I suggest that you work your chest, arms, back and legs twice a week. I also recommend that you stretch prior to lifting weights and stretch after you have finished.

I think you’ll find that in a few short weeks you’ll feel stronger, more energized and just a tad more confident because of your five hours of weekly fitness. Here are some other points to think about.

· Be patient with yourself. Your personal fitness will come along and actually gather steam if you stay focused and dedicated. At the start you might feel some soreness and be a bit fatigued, but stay with it and soon you’ll actually see and feel the improvement.

· Watch other people and learn new things. I continue to watch people and pick up things from my observations. I also like to watch the professional trainers work with people. I’m always picking up a new exercise or routine from them. It's also important to keep your routines fresh and to vary things a bit.

· Have an understanding that no matter your body type, your fitness will show and you’ll look better and feel better about yourself.

· You don’t have to become a food Nazi to eat better. I eat a lot of fruits and vegetables along with fish and nuts. Having said that I’ll eat the occasional burger or piece of chocolate. I just make sure I’m eating more of the fruits and vegetables and by doing so I maintain a constant weight.

· Finally, factor in your age and respect it. Lifting a little bit of weight is just as effective in toning yourself as lifting a lot of weight. It's also important to perform each movement correctly to enhance progress and eliminate injuries. Stretching is critical as you get older and helps keep you flexible and warm your muscles. For example a lot of guys my age have back issues and it’s tied to their hamstrings not being exercised or stretched.

There’s a growing epidemic in this country tied to obesity and heart problems and a lot of nannyism that gets directed to the problem or the latest diet fad. I personally think that as a society we eat more today than ever before and exercise less than ever before. When I was a boy growing up in Iowa I never, ever saw an obese farmer. Simply put, they worked too hard and burned up too many calories to ever be overweight. I truly hope this little article on fitness helps motivate you to do a little something for that sacred vessel you walk around in. The better you treat your physical self, the better you treat your spiritual self.

But, but, but

2008-09-06T11:15:00.000-06:00

I’m currently struggling on my life’s path to enlightenment. Yesterday after twenty minutes of Jappa meditation, fifteen minutes of intense, emotional recitation of my affirmations, and another thirty minutes of reading Thich Nhat Hahn’s book on “Anger, “ I promptly went out and flipped off a woman that was obviously challenged in the skills of operating a motor vehicle. I was absolutely crest fallen because I could have done my laundry during that hour of “Soul Mechanics.” So now I was still an emotional wretch AND my laundry wasn’t done, which created a great deal of emotional trauma.

I’m in the personal development industry and I, me, yours truly had just flipped off a woman, a total stranger. Now granted, she was driving fifty miles per hour in a 25 miles per hour zone, talking on a cell phone while lighting her cigarette with two small children strapped in the back seat of her Hummer II, oh and she almost killed me. I was immediately filled with PDS (Personal Development Shame) and now find myself sitting in a lotus position trying to understand why I did what I did. I mean one of my intense, emotional affirmations is “I always act and speak in a calm reasoned manner.” Well I knew the middle finger was not calm, nor was it reasoned, as a matter of fact there was a strong opinion attached to it.

I continually read about and hear people say, “When I realized I was able to create the kind of life I wanted just through my thoughts, I immediately changed the way I went about things and now I’m so happy I can’t stand it!” How in the hell did they do that? I’ve read at least twenty seven books on personal development, some three and four times and I’ve meditated to the point of floating off my chair and waking up in a closet on the opposite side of the house, and I’ve become so emotional and locked in on my affirmations, my neighbors have called the cops thinking I was being attacked. Still, I had just flipped off a total stranger. My God why?

I thought long and hard. Maybe, if I had been born in the eighties I would have been diagnosed with A.D.D. and gotten my fair share of Ritalin? Or just maybe one of my genes, the one responsible for emotional behavior got stuck into that spiral thing called DNA sideways instead of vertically and I was predisposed to being a temperamental ass all my life? Maybe the house I was renting because my ex-wife could no longer stand being married to me was sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground? All I knew was that tomorrow I’d see that same damn woman and she would have reinforcements because “The Laws of Attraction” said that anything I gave thought and emotion to would attract more of the same and the middle finger was pretty much to the point and very emotional.

But, but, but just maybe flipping her off was totally automatic and there was no emotion attached to it, therefore providing little if any attractive power. Maybe tomorrow at that very intersection I’d see some sweet little old lady trying to cross the street and I could jump out of my car and gently guide her to safety creating a wonderful Karma glow that would follow me throughout my day. Just as I got her across the street she would turn and thank me and at that very instant several doves would alight at my feet and together grandma and I would hand feed them. Then unnoticed in the yard next to us a small choir of six and seven year old kids would serenade us with “Jesus Loves Us.” Who am I kidding! Grandma would probably take a swing at me and start screaming for the cops and the kids would have tattoo’s and be singing a hip hop song and the damn doves would drop one right on my head! Oops, there I go again. Sorry, I think I’ll go meditate on that for a while. Maybe the problem is I’m just human and these things take a while. Well the good news is, I got time on my side. Peace!

That Little Voice

2008-09-04T14:09:00.000-06:00

There's not one human being on this planet that doesn't have a skill or talent that's exceptional. I remember as a boy we had a kid in our small Iowa town that was considered (Retarded) and yet he could sit down with white tablet paper and a pencil and draw the most incredible pictures. They were almost life like and yet the kid was declared dumb and thus attended a class for mentally challenged students. I was supposed to be smart and I loved to draw, but I couldn't come close to matching the images this kid could create. I eventually had to cheat and take up photography where I'd let my camera draw pictures for me.

As the picture in the upper right shows, deep inside each and every one of us there's talent and ability just waiting to be brought to the surface. What holds us back? As a life long victim of constantly getting in my own way I can tell you it's fear, the opinions of others and certainly in my case the burning desire for approval, acceptance and justification from peers and family when quite frankly their opinions didn't matter. What's really important is listening to the voice inside of us and trusting that voice and letting it guide us on our life's journey. That voice will always lead you to a place where you will be happy and full of passion because you will be doing what you were destined to do. I ignored my internal voice and instead constantly fought, kicked and screamed my way up-stream in the Corporate World hating where I was going and knowing that when I got to where-ever it was I was going, I wouldn't be happy or satisfied when I got there. Strangely enough, that little voice never goes away no matter how much you ignore it and over time it actually gets louder.

Here's something else I've learned in this life of battling up stream. It's a lot easier to turn around and let the current, "Your internal guide" simply carry you down stream. The people you see that are prosperous and happy have figured that little ditty out while the stressed out, miserable, hard working members of the local herd are still sloshing up the stream exhausted and miserable.

Think about it for a minute. Were you born into this world to work sixty hours a week, live pay check to pay check, and frantically get to the week-end so you could spend Saturday and Sunday doing all your errands to get caught back up just so you could face Mr. Monday again? Of course you weren't. Every last one of us is here on purpose and this physical experience is supposed to be joyous. If it's not joyous you're cheating yourself, your family and the world in general by not being the very best you can be.

When I finally started listening I was 56 years old, divorced and working 80 hours a week in the restaurant industry. I sat there one night in a loaned out condo sixty miles from my house that was currently up for sale and I said ENOUGH, enough damn it! I quit the next day and embarked on a journey to recapture my life and work on my dual passions of photography and writing. Now if you'll excuse me it's time for my guitar lesson.